Round House
Tuesday, 6 February
In the morning I went to buy books with Tianjuan. The prices of western books are so high that I dared not to buy. It was because the book which was valued 1US$ was sold as guobi for twenty dollars. I took the painful decision to use seventy dollars to buy three records for Lalo’s Spanish Symphony, as well as several scratched records as I had decided to stay in Dushiqiao long term. It was because Lan Ni[1] was coming and I accepted Sun Fo’s invitation to stay at the Round House; in the future when Mrs. Sun arrives I would be unable to cope. Reading was the sole pleasure of living in the countryside, but it was also necessary to have time for a rest psychologically. European music was really able to nurture one’s character. Sun Fo was extremely kind to me, and had suggested that I should find a temporary partner locally, but about my own difficulty I could not even tell him. It was because I was recently plighted by financial difficulty. Although I could borrow from Jincheng, and he would not decline, I absolutely would not do so. If I found someone here to cohabit, I would feel great guilt towards my wife and children in Hong Kong and Macao. To be really honest I do not want to be a saint. I was only a victim of the circumstances. Sun Fo even went one step further and approved a certain lady appointed to be the secretary of the Legislative Yuan. I was really grateful for this but I dare not to do anything.
[1] Lan Ni (also referred to Margery Lan) was the mistress of Sun Fo.